Since I often use the word, soulmate, That Girl’s post: The Soulmate Phenomenon, grabbed my attention. It got me thinking about the word, “soulmate,” which can mean different things to different people. I never liked the expression, “my other half,” or “my better half.” I am not half a person. My soul was okay without a human partner, especially having human and animal friends who loved me. Yet, at times, I did feel like something was missing. I considered that annoying void carefully. If my soulmate was still out there, I didn’t want to get side tracked (again) by an impostor. I clarified what qualities my soulmate would have.
Here are some things I’ve learned about soulmates:
What is a soulmate? The word, soulmate sounds romantic, but for me, it goes beyond romance. It’s someone who is a good fit – not just physically, but mentally and spiritually. My soulmate is someone who nourishes my soul, my true self, the part of me that will live on into eternity. My soulmate was meant for me. He gets me.
Who Can it Be? Can we have more than one soulmate? I believe so. I probably thought my first husband was my soulmate. At first we were a good fit. But in the twenty years we were married, we both changed and grew in different directions. I think I changed more than he did. He would probably agree, but I wouldn’t swear to it. My soul was pretty shaken when he left. After that, I had a much deeper appreciation for my friends. It’s possible that a close friend or relative could be a soulmate.
When is he (or she) going to get here? A soulmate comes when we are ready. He or she may leave and come back again. The man I am now married to was my first love. We dated for less than a year, then he was gone – a sweet memory for 39 years – until the time was right. Though he says it would not have worked out when we were younger, we are clearly a good fit, now. He nourishes my soul. He feels like my soulmate. Maybe he’s my super soulmate.
Why Care? It’s different for everyone, but having a partner or close friend to share life with is a comfort, and in many cases, increases longevity, as long as that person is a good fit, someone who respects you and doesn’t add constant stress to your life. Being with someone who understands and nurtures us, improves the quality of life. Soulmates encourage healthy growth and well being in one another.
How to find one? In my April newsletter, I’ll be sharing about the five steps I took that helped my soulmate find me. Here’s the overview:
- Clarify desires
- Turn it over
- Work on YOU
- Focus on friendship
For details coming next week, sign up for my monthly newsletter at the sidebar on the right.
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What are your thoughts about soulmates? Do you think we can have more than one?