Anything is Possible!

With Faith, Hope and Perseverance


14 Comments

Like an Adolescent Girl Approaching Menopause

Song Lyric Sunday

It was years ago, after the rebound from hell, after stumbling around in purgatory, as I entered my unintenional five years of celibacy, that I was crazy about the girl band, Superchick. Their style was aimed at adolescent girls and had subtle Christian undertones. That must have been what I needed back in those post-divorce years. In some ways, I was like a adolescent girl, approaching menopause, trying to find myself again.

“Beauty for Pain” in particular helped pull me out of darkness and gave me hope.

The chorus is my favorite part:

After all this has passed, I still will remain
After I’ve cried my last, there’ll be beauty from pain
Though it won’t be today, someday I’ll hope again
And there’ll be beauty from pain
You will bring beauty from my pain

Today’s theme for Song Lyric Sunday was, “pain.” For more information, visit Helen at:

https://helenespinosa.wordpress.com/2017/04/22/song-lyric-sunday-theme-for-42317/


14 Comments

Lesson Learned – One-Liner Wednesday

“If it don’t fit, don’t force it.”

I learned this lesson from my two post-divorce rebounds. It took long enough! The first one, the “rebound from hell,” lasted a year, which was a year too long. The second rebound lasted three years and was not hellish, though it did feel like purgatory in the end. At least I was making progress. Five years of celibacy taught me that it was entirely possible to be happy without a man in my life and helped me accept that I could be the love of my life. Then, I got the surprise of my life!

1linerwedsbadgewes

One-liner Wednesday is brought to us by Linda Hill. You can read more one-liners and see Linda’s pretty new colors at:

https://lindaghill.com/2017/04/12/one-liner-wednesday-colour-my-world/

Here are the One-Liner Wednesday rules which I sometimes follow:

1. Make it one sentence.

2. Try to make it either funny or inspirational.

3. Use our unique tag #1linerWeds.

4. Add our very cool badge to your post for extra exposure!

5. Have fun!

 


11 Comments

Tangible Healing

broken-heart-from-pixabay

It was 16 years ago. The emotional pain was tangible. Like the bottom fell out of my stomach and my head was somewhere far away.

I had believed that “to death do us part” meant that we would grow old together, and travel out west chasing the sunsets.

I was willing to work on it, to do my part, be more attentive, go on vacations, whatever.

But it was too late.

They said it was just acid-reflux that made my chest feel so tight, like a fist closing around my heart.

So I had to learn to take slow deep breaths in between the sobs in the hallway sitting on the hardwood floor when the kids had gone to their dad’s new place.

It took time for the pain to subside into mere sadness. Then there were the cover-up rebounds. The first one a disaster, the second better, but stressful and not a good fit. But at least I was  making progress.

Finally, I learned to work on me, and to trust that God had a plan.

Now, my heart sings a new song, better than any song I could have imagined.

Now, the joy is tangible like the ocean waves  caressing my skin, like a cool breeze on a warm day, or a warm blanket on a cold night.

healing

I painted this during the cover-up rebounds.

(The broken heart at the top is from pixabay)

This post was written in response to the Just Jot it January prompt: “tangible,” provided by Prajakta at https://anarmchairperfectionist.wordpress.com/

This post is also for TS.

Except for the last two lines, it summarizes Chapter 13 of my Work in Progress.

 

just-jot-january

The rules for Just Jot It January are as follows:

1. It’s never too late to join in! Here, we run on the honour system; the “jot it” part of JusJoJan means that anything you jot down, anywhere (it doesn’t have to be a post, it can even be a grocery list) counts as a “Jot.” If it makes it to your blog that day, great! If it waits a week to get from a sticky note to your screen, no problem!

2. The prompts will be posted every day at 2am my time (GMT -5). You don’t have to follow the prompt word, but this will be where you leave your link for others to see. Make sure you link your post to the correct day’s prompt. There will be a post like this every day except Wednesday, when the prompt is simply my One-Liner Wednesday, and Saturday, when you’ll find the prompt on my usual Friday Reminder post for Stream of Consciousness Saturday (SoCS).

3. As long as your blog is on WordPress, you’ll be able to link via pingback. To execute a pingback, just copy the URL from the daily prompt post, and paste it anywhere in your post. Check to make sure your link shows up where you want it to, and go back occasionally to see other bloggers’ entries – the more you visit others, the more they’ll visit you! If you’re participating from another blogging host, just drop a link into the comment section. Note: The newest pingbacks and comments will be at the top.

4. Tag your post JusJoJan and/or #JusJoJan.

5. Write anything! Any length will do! It can even be a photo or a drawing – you’re going to title it, right? There’s your jot!

6. The prompts are here both to remind you and to inspire you to write. However, you don’t have to use the prompt word of the day. You can link any kind of jot back here. Even your shopping list. Note: If it’s 18+ content, please say so in a comment with your link.

7. If you’d like to, use the JusJoJan badge (above) in your post so that others can find your post more easily.

8. Have fun!

If you’d like to look ahead to see the upcoming prompt words, click this link: https://lindaghill.com/2016/12/31/just-jot-it-january-2017-rules/ You can always write your post ahead of time and schedule it to come out on the appropriate day.

 

 


27 Comments

Does it Really Need to Be That Complicated?

frustration-from-pixabay

Photo compliments of Pixabay. Search word: “frustrated”

Linda’s prompt for this Saturday’s Stream of Consciousness post was: “moot.” I thought I knew what it meant: meaningless, worthless, not worth bothering with. But I’m glad I looked it up, because I was wrong!  Google’s first definition for moot was:

“subject to debate, dispute, or uncertainty, and typically not admitting of a final decision.”

Maybe I was subconsciously thinking of the word, mute. Did anyone else think moot meant meaningless? Anyway, it’s good to get that cleared up. Thanks, Linda.

Moot is a good word to describe my relationship with a certain email marketing system. I spent a lot of time setting this up to send out my monthly newsletter. I like the creative aspects of this kind of work, and I’m not as low-tech as I used to be, but this particular system, the only one I’ve used so far, almost drove me crazy yesterday. Last month I spent more than a couple  hours figuring out about content boxes and where everything was to paste my newsletter parts into the template I’d created. Yesterday, I spent two hours figuring it out, but when I looked at the preview, there was stuff from November in the current template which was a separate template….Anyway, sorry to bore you with this.

I don’t want to deal with it anymore. It shouldn’t be this complicated. Reminds me of the rebound relationships I had after my divorce. Yes, they were good at fixing things around my house, and they seemed confident on the surface, but they were too complicated in ways that were too much work. Fixer uppers. I finally decided it just wasn’t worth the cost to my serenity. I didn’t need that much stress in my life. I could deal with it if I had to, but I didn’t have to.

That’s how I feel right now about the email marketing platform. Too much monkey business for me. So I’m sending out my December newsletter the old-fashioned way, as an attachment from my personal email. Maybe it’s a good thing my list isn’t that long right now. Someday, maybe I’ll try that monkey thing again, or another company. I don’t know. But right now, it’s moot.

Oh, I almost forgot. I believe I removed those pop ups asking if people wanted to sign up for my newsletter. I never really liked pop ups anyway. If you like them, that’s fine. But I felt uncomfortable with them being here. So if you see any pop ups here, please let me know. And if you want to get my monthly newsletter the old-fashioned way, just email me at the address on my contact page.

Thanks for letting me vent.

The Stream of Consciousness can be therapeutic! If you want to read more about “moot,” visit Linda’s blog:

https://lindaghill.com/2016/12/16/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-dec-1716

socsbadge2016-17

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

8. Have fun!

 


8 Comments

Moving On from That to This

socs-badge-2015

“That was then, this is now.”

Can I learn from my mistakes and not dwell on them? Yes, I can!

I can learn that back then, I got confused and got into this rebound with some one who was all so very wrong for me. Now, I have more compassion for people who stay in unhealthy relationships too long. Now, I’m with someone who is good for me.

I used to worry too much about what other people think about me. Now, it still crosses my mind, but I remind myself, I don’t need to worry about that. Now I’m focused more on taking care of myself and being real, and authentic – that word keeps popping up in my mind lately. Authentic.

Don’t you just hate it when your mind goes to something you did that you can’t believe you did? I hate it. But I must forgive myself and remember, that was then and this is now. Now I know better. Does that mean I won’t make stupid or embarrassing mistakes every now and then. No. I’ll still do that sometimes. But I can laugh at myself easier and easier. I can allow myself to be human and imperfect.

I was just thinking yesterday of something I did that was stupid and embarrassing. Now, I can’t remember what it was. I’m not going to try to rack my brain about it either. I’m sure I have the lesson somewhere in my brain without recalling exactly what happened.

Now, I will still remember many of my mistakes, and I’m just going to roll my eyes about that. I’m not going to beat myself up about mistakes I’ve made in the past, because I’m smarter than that, I’m better than that, and I deserve better….than that!

I would be remiss if I did not admit I did not know the origin of the words, “That was then, this is now.” I looked it up to find the credit goes to Susan Eloise Hinton, aka, SE Hinton who wrote the book by this title which was made into a movie.

It’s also a song by Josh Wilson:

AND then I discovered it’s also the title of an OLD song recoreded by the Monkees!

Today’s Stream of Consciousness post prompt from Linda Hill was:

“this and that.”  Talk about this, talk about that, talk about this and that, but here’s the catch: make either “this” or “that” the first word of your post. Bonus points if you can end with “this” or “that.” Enjoy!

If you’d like to join this fun, visit this link:

http://lindaghill.com/2016/03/04/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-march-516/

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

8. Have fun!


11 Comments

Rebound From Hell

socs-badge

Is it really better to have loved and lost, than to never have loved at all?

Well, considering the word, “never,” which I don’t like to use, then the answer would be yes. To have never loved at all, would be sad. But if we expand this question beyond romantic love, then who hasn’t loved some one or some thing?

In my post-divorce single years, trying to be cynical about love, I laughed out loud when I saw the following saying on T-shirt:

“It’s better to have loved and lost, than to live the rest of your life with a psychotic.”

I’m not saying my x husband suffered from psychosis. But my post-divorce rebound from hell probably did. Of course I didn’t know it when I met him. And neither did he. People are on their best behavior when we first meet them. And I was blinded by grief and codependency.

The rebound from hell contained one crisis after another. Thank God it only lasted a year, which was a year too long, though I feel like the delusional jealousy and emotional abuse took years off my life.  I am reclaiming those years, now!

To be perfectly honest, I wish I’d never loved him. The best thing that came out of that relationship was learning to have compassion for people who stay in unhealthy relationships too long.

Every relationship teaches us something we need to learn. I needed to learn to love and respect myself again. I needed know that I am loved and cherished by a Power greater than myself who brings me back to sanity. I had to learn to honor my own boundaries, to be ready for healthy love with some one else. Some one who is not  psychotic.

Not that I have anything against psychotic people. As long as they are getting therapy and/or working a recovery program, taking medications as prescribed (if prescribed), and can respect me and my boundaries, fine. We can hang out.

We all have broken places that need mending. We all have something to work on. We all need love. Good, healthy love.

Today, I celebrate my independence from co-dependence.

 

Linda’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday post prompt for today was “is.” And I got bonus points for using it at the end of a word :).

If you’d like to join in the fun, visit:

http://lindaghill.com/2015/07/03/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-july-415/

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

8. Have fun!


10 Comments

Friendship First!

socs-badge

Badge by: Doobster @ Mindful Digressions

Do you ever wonder about how we get to be friends with some people. Those seemingly random encounters, when you find an immediate connection, make me wonder. A past life relationship? Or does God want us to learn something from each other?

Does God set up blind dates for us with people we can learn from?

Friendship was paramount in my teen years. Then family became the focus, along with work relationships.

As I’ve gotten older, with the kids grown (mostly) friendship becomes more important.

After the divorce, after the crappy rebound, and the not quite right re-re-bound, I constantly reminded myself:

FOCUS ON FRIENDSHIP!

  FRIENDSHIP FIRST!

I befriended myself. And of course the dogs were the most constant friends of all.

Then there was the reunion with the high school girlfriends, after 30 plus years, we got together for a long weekend.

Friendship with those special ladies led to my high school sweetheart finding me again.  I won’t give you all the details, because they’re in the memoir I’m working on.

But the key was friendship first.

I still cherish those friendships. And I cherish the friendship I have with my husband.

We talk a lot about love, but the best kind of love, I believe, begins and ends with being friends.

Even my love for God is enriched by a component of friendship.

 

This week’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday prompt was acquaint/friend. If you’d like to join in the fun, visit:

Special Edition Friday Prompt for SoCS February 28/15

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” or “Begin with the word ‘The’.”

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments, for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. Have fun!