Anything is Possible!

With Love, Hope, and Perseverance


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SoCS & JusJoJan: Manifesting and Letting Go

Your prompt for #JusJoJan and Stream of Consciousness Saturday is: “close eyes and point.” When you’re ready to write your post, open a book, a newspaper, or whatever is handy and close your eyes and point. Whatever word or picture your finger lands on, make that the basis of your SoCS/JusJoJan post. Enjoy!

The book closest to me was, The Language of Letting Go, by Melody Beattie. It’s a daily meditation book for codependents. Her first one. It’s my second copy because I wore the first one out. But I haven’t read it in a long time, so I’m surprised it was close by. Maybe I was going to lend it to someone.

We’ve been through a lot together.

Anyway, here’s what I pointed to:

“It may not happen the way we wanted it to and hoped it would. But our controlling wouldn’t have made it happen either. “ (July 23: “Making it Happen”)

Hmmm. Some things have actually turned out better than I hoped they would. Other things did not. Life is full of surprises. Trying to control things is a hard habit to break. The other day, I went out with my adult daughter and found myself telling her she should do this or that. She was relatively patient with me, and I need to apologize. It’s not like I was doing it a lot, but more than I should. Yikes! There’s the should word again! We are human.

When things don’t turn out the way we hoped or dreamed or did all that manifesting stuff, maybe it’s because God has other plans. God or the Universe, whoever. There are powers greater than us who know better what we need. And it aint over til it’s over. Maybe God has something even better planned!

All we have to do is our best. That does not mean perfect. My best is different on any given day. Sometimes my best is listening well, being kind, sorting a stack of papers, throwing stuff out, exercising and eating well, or maybe my best is just doing one of those things. Some days, my best is getting a load of laundry done and watching a movie.

We should can let God and the universe know what we want. Name our hearts’ desires, imagine the feelings we’ll have when we get what we want or something even better. We can go ahead and work hard for our hopes and dreams increasing the chances of them coming true. But God and the universe might have other plans. Maybe there are lessons we need to learn first, like I wrote about in my book. Maybe we need to walk the long and winding road. Or maybe our dream come true is right around the corner.

The point is, stop trying SO hard. Stop worrying SO much. Ask, do your best, and let it go. (Note to self.)

Stream of Consciousness Saturday and Just Jot January is brought to us by Linda Hill. For more info, visit:

The Friday Reminder for #SoCS & #JusJoJan 2021 Daily Prompt – Jan. 23rd | (lindaghill.com)


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Little Love Gifts

Heart box in grass

“God has planned little gifts along the way to brighten our day, and sometimes big delightful surprises – perfectly timed, perfect for us.”

Melody Beattie, The Language of Letting Go. February 2.

I just had to share this  quote from today’s daily meditation. It fits well with my story in Trust the Timing, which I’ll be giving away as an e book on Goodreads starting February 12.

The quote sorta also goes with Bee’s prompt, Adoration, on Love is in Da Blog, because God adores us so much we get these little love gifts – like spectacular sunsets, flowers growing in unexpected places, and hugs. It’s not always easy to see the gifts. We might have to look in new ways and in new places, but they are there to encourage us and give us hope.

Love is in da blog (2)


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Gratitude Makes Sense of our Past

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”

Melody Beattie

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 Twenty years of Holy Matrimony

Tossed out like old shoes.

What happened to the promise?

To the dream?

To the love?

Change ran them off

Down divergent paths.

autumn-front-2

Years

of

Confusion

and

Loneliness

Finally passed as

 Acceptance

Seeped into the empty space

 Making room for new possibilities.

 I found my self again.

And loved me for my soul.

And  when the time was right,

Everything made sense.

live-oak-afternoon-good

Now I’m thankful that he made that space

and found a better fit,

Thankful for the time to heal

and learning to let go,

Thankful for the lessons learned

on long and winding roads,

Thankful for convergent paths

That brought my true love home.

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© 2016 JoAnne Macco.

Happy Thanksgiving to all my friends and followers for whom I am very thankful! 


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How to Help an Addict (or Alcoholic)

Iron fence

Last week, I shared things I’ve learned about addiction and recovery over the past thirty years. When I started working in the substance abuse field, there were drug counselors, and there were alcohol counselors. Over time, we realized people switch addictions.  So when I say addict, I include alcoholic, because alcohol is a mood altering, potentially addictive drug. Sometimes I say alcohol and other drugs. Either way, chemical dependence affects not only the “identified patient,” it affects family members, loved ones, and everyone who cares.

We worry about them. We lie awake at night and wonder about what we did or didn’t do. Did we lecture too much? Should we have said more? We feel shame, anger, confusion and fear. We feel love. Even when we don’t want to feel anything. When we try to control situations beyond our control, or try to make everyone happy, we just end up making ourselves sick. We wonder how we can help.

What I’ve learned is that we have to put our own oxygen masks on first. We have to make sure we are taking care of ourselves.

Here are some other things I’ve learned that might help those who care about some one struggling with alcohol or other drug problems:

1. Develop a support network for you. Go to Alanon, Naranon  Celebrate Recovery, Codependents Anonymous or an open AA or NA meeting. One of my favorite daily meditation books is, The Language of Letting Go, Daily Meditations for Codependents, by Melody Beattie. I believe it saved my sanity a time or two.

2. Invite your loved one to clean and sober activities, like going to a movie, or for a walk, or any low risk event where there will be no alcohol or other drugs.

3. Be encouraging, not critical. Try not to bring up the past. Express your needs. Express your fears and concerns if you need to, but express your hopes more.

4. Ask how you can help support their recovery, but set boundaries to take care of yourself. As one family member put it:

“I’ll help you in your recovery but not in your addiction.”

5. Don’t drink or use around them. I know this might be controversial.  Some people in recovery might say it’s okay for you to drink around them. Unless this person has been clean and sober for a long time, like 10 years, and works a program, it’s not worth the risk. Model that it’s possible to have fun and live life without drinking/drugging.

6. Don’t enable the problem: Don’t give money, don’t clean up messes, or cover up the natural consequences of the addiction. It’s okay to provide food, or if the person is working a recovery program, maybe pay a bill, but not repeatedly. (If safety is an issue, do what’s necessary to help someone, especially children, be safe.)

7. Offer to provide child care so the person can go to a meeting or counseling appointment. Or offer to help with rides to meetings or counseling appointments if you can.

8.Pray. The Serenity Prayer is always a good one, and works for about any situation.

9. Take care of yourself. Set reasonable boundaries for your own well-being. Get the rest, nutrition and support you need.

10. Never give up hope. Recovery takes time. Things might get worse, even after the drinking and drugging stop, before they get better. You might need to create distance to protect yourself, but remember: there is always hope.

bridge


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The Magic of Gratitude

glass of water

This photo is brought to you from pixabay.com with Gratitude.

 

“Gratitude unlocks the fullness of life. It turns what we have into enough, and more. It turns denial into acceptance, chaos to order, confusion to clarity. It can turn a meal into a feast, a house into a home, a stranger into a friend. Gratitude makes sense of our past, brings peace for today and creates a vision for tomorrow.”
Melody Beattie

This is one of my favorite quotes by one of my favorite writers.  It originally came to me from her book, The Language of Letting Go, Daily Meditations for Codependents, in the meditation for August 1st.

Why August instead of later November? Because we need the magic of gratitude every day.

She goes on to write:

“Gratitude makes things right. Gratitude turns negative energy into positive energy. There is no situation or circumstance so small or large that it is not susceptible to gratitude’s  power. We can start with who we are and what we have today, apply gratitude, then let it work it’s magic.”

Is it possible that something as simple as gratitude can be so powerful?

 I believe so.

After I stopped asking why I couldn’t couldn’t find the right partner,

After I started to thank God for blessings, including the mystery ones on the way,

My soul mate came back to me.

Blessings are on the way!

Give thanks!

I’m thankful for my soul mate.

I’m thankful for good health.

I’m thankful to have time to write and paint.

I’m thankful for the blessings on the way!

Arboretum yellow flowers