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One-Liner Wednesday: He Kissed Her and Went to Hide the Head

A new head

“So what do you want for your birthday?” He hoped to cheer her up and distract her from the migraine.

She closed her eyes. “I just want a new head.”

A week later, on her birthday, he got Betty a new head.

“Oh Jim. That’s ugly! That’s what you got me for my birthday?!”

“You said you wanted a new head. Look, it glows in the dark!” He turned off the light and held the thing up.

“Eeew! That’s not not funny,” she said laughing. “My headache’s gone now. Don’t bring it back.” She turned the light back on and noticed he was hiding something behind his back. “What did you really get me for my birthday?”

“I got you what you asked for, a new head.” Then he grinned. “And this.” He brought his other hand around revealing the¬†Whitman’s Sampler.


“That’s more like it.” She snatched the box.

“You gonna share?”

“Only if you get rid of that head.”

“Aw, come on. We can save it for Halloween.”

“Alright, but put it away where I won’t see it. I like my head better.”

“Yeah. Me, too.” He kissed her and went to hide the head.


I meant to make this a simple one-liner, but it turned into a story about my parents. It’s true that my mom said she wanted a new head when she had a migraine and that dad bought her a new one. I remember it hanging in his garage years ago and found it recently going through his stuff.


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