Overcoming My Fear of Heights, Sort of, But Not Really.

Today’s Stream of Consciousness prompt is, “high/low.”

I am not a fan of heights. That’s a nice way of saying I have a fear of heights, or rather a fear of falling from a high place. Was it an anxious mother or something wired into my brain? I suppose it would be a good adaptation for a child to be born with. But if you’re born with it, it’s not an adaptation, except for the species.

I’ve pushed myself outside my comfort zone doing an outdoor adventure ropes course, walking on a wire in a harness. Loved the zip line once I trusted the equipment. But most heights are not a natural high for me. One exception is if I’m jumping into water. In my early twenties, I flirted with becoming a lifeguard  being trained by a lifeguard who was sort of flirting with me. I didn’t follow through on it, because I was in my twenties and….got distracted easily. But I did get to jump off of a diving platform that was about ? 35 feet high. That’s just a guess. I was scared at first, but knowing the water would catch me, it turned out to be exhilarating.

Water is my friend. The earth is my friend. My natural highs are mostly low to the ground. Water envelopes me, like in the womb maybe. It cools my fire sign – Sagittarius. I’ve always wanted to go caving, and loved scuba diving in my twenties. So quiet and peaceful down there.

I sometimes wonder what I’d do if I HAD to walk across one of those swinging bridges, miles above a crocodile-filled river. The kind of bridge with old wooden slats you can see in  between.  The only way I could do it would be to not look down. That’s what I’ve learned.  I walked on the “Mile High Swinging Bridge” at Grandfather Mountain in NC once.  Looking down made me feel nauseous. I was okay as long as I only looked where I was putting my feet, and held on to the railing. And nobody made the bridge swing. And there was no wind. Then it was a piece of cake. I was happy to get to the last step and onto solid rock.

I do like to look out across the mountain tops from a good solid piece of earth.

No outcroppings. No dangling my feet over the edge. (Unless there’s deep water below and no crocs.)

My natural highs are earthy. Riding horses. Swimming.  I don’t mind deep water I know will hold me.  Digging in the dirt. Re-arranging plants and seedlings. And dark chocolate.  Let’s not forget that! Watching sunsets. Colored glass. Singing – especially figuring out harmonies and getting them to blend. Getting a massage. Soft, steady caresses that take me to a trance.

These are things that would tend to keep my blood pressure low which it normally is. My husband on the other hand, likes to fly. He wants to re-certify his pilot’s license. He tends to have high blood pressure. He is not fond of swimming. But he goes into the ocean with me, even though he’d rather be in the sky. Some day, I’ll go flying with him.

(The first two photos are from Pixabay. The last two are from me. )

The Saturday Stream of Consciousness is brought to you by Linda at:

https://lindaghill.com/2017/08/04/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-aug-517/

Stop by Linda’s blog for more takes on high/low.

Here are the SoCS rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” “Begin with the word ‘The’,” or simply a single word to get your started.

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours. Your link will show up in my comments for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top. NOTE: Pingbacks only work from WordPress sites. If you’re self-hosted or are participating from another host, such as Blogger, please leave a link to your post in the comments below.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. As a suggestion, tag your post “SoCS” and/or “#SoCS” for more exposure and more views.

8. Have fun!

Opposites Attract, But Similarities Sustain

Opposites do attract. We’re often drawn to partners or friends who have qualities we lack. This can be a good thing, up to a point. If there are too may opposites, there’s going to be trouble.

When we were dating (for the second time) my husband confessed, “I’m allergic to fun.” I thought he was kidding. He works hard and is hard on himself. I can understand this, but my desire for myself is to have more fun. We had lots of fun when we dated, getting to know each other again; the butterflies and excitement of falling in love tends to make us giddy and overlook things.

Fortunately, we also asked a lot of questions to find out if there were any deal breakers. To find out if there was  enough common ground.

But back to the opposites. He says he is not artistic. And he’s not when it comes to free flowing things, improvisation, dance, playful art. I am more artistic. He is more precise. I tend to be scattered. He is more focused. (I’ve come to believe that’s mostly a guy thing.) He is great with numbers, me not so much.

I love to sing. My husband stopped singing in his late teens after being ridiculed. When we found each other again, he didn’t sing at all. But he’s been working on this for a couple years, and now sings in our church choir with me. He knows how I love to sing and wants to be with me enough to overcome his fear of singing. He’s also overcoming his fear of swimming in deep water due to a close call a long time ago.  I love to swim. He was a fire fighter and pilot, so he’s not at all afraid of heights like I am. I get motion sickness at the drop of a hat. But when he gets a chance to fly a plane again, I’ll be there with him, right after I take my Dramamine.

I used to be addicted to TV and movies. My husband doesn’t watch TV and rarely goes to movies. But he did like Interstellar which we saw together. It’s a good thing I took my daughter with me to see Wild. And there’s no way he’ll want to go see Into the Woods. But that’s okay.

Even though opposites attract, similarities are necessary for a happy, long lasting relationship.

My husband and I both love dogs. We  like to grow things in dirt and eat healthy. While we both partied plenty in our younger days, we’re now conservative in our lifestyles, though not our beliefs. We are responsible, frugal and conscientious. We believe in giving back to the community. We search for meaning in spirituality. We’re both Christians, but we’re open minded enough to respect the beliefs of others. We respect each others differences. We listen to each other. We both like garlic.

These are important similarities. Without them, it wouldn’t work.

And it’s working quite well.

 

This week’s Stream of Consciousness Saturday Post was the word: “opposite.” If you’d like to join in the fun, visit:

http://lindaghill.com/2015/01/09/the-friday-reminder-and-prompt-for-socs-january-1015/

Here are the rules:

1. Your post must be stream of consciousness writing, meaning no editing, (typos can be fixed) and minimal planning on what you’re going to write.

2. Your post can be as long or as short as you want it to be. One sentence – one thousand words. Fact, fiction, poetry – it doesn’t matter. Just let the words carry you along until you’re ready to stop.

3. There will be a prompt every week. I will post the prompt here on my blog on Friday, along with a reminder for you to join in. The prompt will be one random thing, but it will not be a subject. For instance, I will not say “Write about dogs”; the prompt will be more like, “Make your first sentence a question,” or “Begin with the word ‘The’.”

4. Ping back! It’s important, so that I and other people can come and read your post! For example, in your post you can write “This post is part of SoCS:” and then copy and paste the URL found in your address bar at the top of this post into yours.  Your link will show up in my comments, for everyone to see. The most recent pingbacks will be found at the top.

5. Read at least one other person’s blog who has linked back their post. Even better, read everyone’s! If you’re the first person to link back, you can check back later, or go to the previous week, by following my category, “Stream of Consciousness Saturday,” which you’ll find right below the “Like” button on my post.

6. Copy and paste the rules (if you’d like to) in your post. The more people who join in, the more new bloggers you’ll meet and the bigger your community will get!

7. Have fun!