This post is inspired by Eliza at: https://elizajourneythroughlife.home.blog/
I’m sending this back in time to myself whenever it’s needed most, sometime in my late teens or early twenties when I had thoughts about suicide.
Dear JoAnne,
It’s me, your future self, writing this to you when I am 65 years old which doesn’t feel as old as I thought it would back then when I was 20. Believe me, there is plenty of life to live.
I know this is hard time for you. I know you are confused and lost trying to figure out what to do with your life. I know your heart aches and that you’ve had thoughts of giving up. Don’t give up! It’s very important that you know life will get better. There will be hard times ahead. There will be times when you feel your heart is breaking, but the good times will vastly, surely, and greatly outweigh the bad. When I look back at all the good times over the past 45 years, I am so grateful that I didn’t give up.
You will gradually gain the skills to navigate and overcome the hard times. Things that seem impossible now, will someday be easier or less important.
There are good times, wonderful times, ahead with the constants in your life: nature, art, writing, dogs, horses, cats, learning, and spirituality. These are the things you need to focus on now – the true loves of your life that always nurture your spirit and feed your soul. There will be love. Love from men, friends, and family. Your parents love you very much, even more than you can realize right now since you haven’t had children, yet, but you will. The love of family and friends is important. For now, don’t worry about the men, especially the ones who act like boys. You deserve love that is kind and caring, mature and strong. It might take a while, but you will have it. For now focus on loving yourself.
You are valuable! You are worth so much more than you know. You have so much to give to this world with all your gifts, gifts that are still being developed.
I know you might not want to hear this right now, but God loves you deeply, profoundly and forever. Just trust me on this. Your family is praying for you every day. Let this knowledge strengthen you. I know your ideas about religion are eclectic and nontraditional, and that’s okay. That’s part of who you are. But understand that there is a Higher Power who loves you dearly and has a wonderful plan for you! Trust the timing.
So, forget about men for now. Remember your dreams. Your dreams may change, but they will always be about helping others and Mother Earth. For now, focus on loving yourself and learning. Cut down on the drinking. Be safe. Go back to college. Feel free to explore different classes, different interests.
There’s a whole world of possibilities waiting for you!
I’m sending big hugs and abundant love across time to you. Be still for a moment and feel it. Then move forward with you wonderful life. I promise your life will be will be interesting, beautiful and full of wonder.
I love you always,
JoAnna
…
Today’s Just Jot January topic was, “Letter.” I’m thankful to E for her nudge and patience on this letter and to Linda, our JusJoJan host for getting me to go through my draft ideas to get it written.
For more on Just Jot January, visit: #JusJoJan prompt the 11th – “Letter” | (lindaghill.com)
Anything is Possible! 
January 11, 2021 at 11:15 am
Loved this letter! When we are very young, we do not have the experience or perspective to see that things will ever get better. Problems tend to seem insurmountable. I think information and advice on this topic should be a part of health education in high school. There are too many suicides among young people. Do you have any interest in writing curriculum?
Have a great week, JoAnna! ❤
January 11, 2021 at 11:21 am
Thank you, Cheryl! I was thinking recently that I am better writing non-fiction since I’ve had more experience and training there. I liked writing for our operations manual at the nonprofit mental health agency I worked at I would probably like writing curriculum and would be interested in your ideas. Thanks very much!
January 11, 2021 at 11:54 am
JoAnna, I remember in PE classes in 10th grade health, we studied mental illnesses. Whatever mental illness we studied, I seemed to have all of the symptoms! 🙂 Later I realized that mental illness is often a matter of degree! The class was well-intentioned, but not very constructive.
Although my master’s is in curriculum and instruction, I taught at the elementary level and have been retired for 10 years. I wish I could be more helpful!
I think that with your background and writing skills you could make a valuable contribution to high school mental health curriculum. Maybe you could contact the curriculum department of your state and offer to collaborate or contribute on the subject of suicide prevention and other mental health topics. Maybe they would like to incorporate this type of content into online curriculum.
All the best! ❤
January 11, 2021 at 8:35 pm
I agree that mental health is often a matter of degree. Sometimes a diagnosis is clear, but there are people at risk without having had an official diagnosis. I’ve never had a mental health diagnosis other than, maybe adjustment disorder to a specific situation, but there were times in my late teens and early twenties (after my sister died) when I was only a few steps from the ledge and put myself in dangerous situations. I am honored by your confidence in my writing ability and will consider your suggestion.
January 11, 2021 at 1:20 pm
I believe that the twenty-year-old JoAnne got your letter 🙂 After all, she didn’t give up and is here today as a fulfillment of all the wonderful things of life that you told her about ❤
January 11, 2021 at 8:45 pm
That was my hope today as I wrote the letter. Your confirmation brings sweet tears of joy to my eyes. Thank you, Rosaliene. ❤
January 12, 2021 at 12:20 pm
❤
January 12, 2021 at 6:10 am
This letter should be helpful to any number of young people
January 12, 2021 at 12:27 pm
Thank you very much, Derrick. I’m sharing it here and there.
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