This is exactly what I learned to do after my divorce. It took time. There was all that grief to work through, a codependent relapse or two, and a great deal of questioning.
But in time, I found me again. I put my love into the constants that had always been there for me: God, dogs, nature, painting, writing, singing, swimming, and family. I explored new interests like drumming, improvisational dance, and kayaking. I bought myself flowers and encouraging cards. Slowly but surely, I healed. In some ways, the healing was like coming home. In other ways, it was like a mid-life adolescence but with a little more wisdom and growing self-love.
What are the constants in your life that can support you through hard times?
What else can help heal a broken heart?
My back cover painting for Trust the Timing
Anything is Possible! 
July 20, 2017 at 9:47 am
Reblogged this on Loving Me, Too.
July 20, 2017 at 9:50 am
I am so glad you found your “ME” and you are sharing your journey and your talent. I love the painting
July 20, 2017 at 9:52 am
Thank you! Sharing our journeys helps us remember we are never alone.
July 20, 2017 at 12:17 pm
So encouraging.. someone I love kind of rejected my love and it hurts so bad 😦
July 20, 2017 at 8:47 pm
I’m sorry you are hurting, Himali. I remember how terrible it can feel. But so glad you felt encouraged. It will get better. And there will be someone even better for you. ❤
July 20, 2017 at 1:29 pm
That’s a fabulous quote about using energy wisely.
When relationships go sour, I focus on the positive memories and think, “Well that was a nice time.” It’s my version of “We’ll always have Paris.” There’s always something wonderful out there and it won’t come if we sit around in regret or dwell in the negatives.
July 20, 2017 at 8:50 pm
Great attitude, Joey! There’s always something good to remember and something to learn from every relationship.
July 20, 2017 at 1:31 pm
Such a fantastic post…lessons learned the hard way, but invaluable, no doubt. I’m so happy for you that you found happiness after heartbreak. I’ve found that the antidote to my people-pleasing (rooted in a sense of having to earn belonging) has been to focus on the ways I am worthy of, not just belonging, but eager invitation…focusing on being my best self (as I, not others, define me), pursuing/engaging in my gifts and attractions (writing, nature–especially grass, trees, flowers, sun, and skies–kind people, funny people, caring and empathetic people, songs etc) fills me up to the point that I don’t have nearly as much time to waste trying to rescue and care for others who don’t reciprocate.
July 20, 2017 at 8:57 pm
Thank you for this thoughtful and inspiring comment! I will focus on worthiness and being my best self, as I define me. I love that, and the ways you are filled.
July 21, 2017 at 1:13 pm
This is beautiful and so very true. I had an unrequited love situation a few years ago, and it only very recently that I truly saw it for what it was and stopped hurting. Thank you for sharing!
July 21, 2017 at 2:34 pm
Time sure does give us a broader perspective! I’m glad you enjoyed the post. Thanks for sharing your experience, too!
July 22, 2017 at 12:09 pm
The painting is beautiful, JoAnna! I paint, read, listen to music, pray and spend time with positive people.
Work takes up a lot of my time, drains me but my body is stronger. Hopefully, blogging keeps my mind active. Thanks for this lovely post!
July 22, 2017 at 10:53 pm
I’m so glad you related to this and that you’re taking good care of yourself! ❤
July 23, 2017 at 8:34 am
I loved your description of healing, JoAnna. Sometimes it feels like getting to know ourselves again after a fight or something. We have to rebuild trust with ourselves slowly, drive without speaking but remain committed to just being in the car together, do new things we’ve not done before. Eventually that miracle of stitching up occurs, if we are willing to release grief and pain and plow it back into the land that we are and grow something new from it. It takes a season of wind and sun and rain for new life to take root and grow!
Blessings
Michael
July 23, 2017 at 10:02 pm
Thank you for this beautiful analogy, Michael, and this deeper understanding of how time heals. Blessings to you. ❤
July 27, 2017 at 3:57 pm
Very true and needs to be shared. I learnt to share with a women’s group led by Lew Epstein from San Francisco. He and his wife worked with couples and I began to trust in being loved again!
July 27, 2017 at 10:17 pm
Rebuilding trust can take time. I’m so glad you had this wonderful experience!
August 2, 2017 at 11:46 am
This is so beautiful! Thank you for encouraging others through the hurt you’ve experienced. Time does heal x
September 4, 2017 at 11:33 am
Hi, Lieila. Sorry I missed this comment earlier. Thank you for seeing the beauty in this. I hope it does help hearts to heal. It’s amazing how time works! x
September 3, 2017 at 9:57 pm
4 months and still broken… it destroyed me
September 4, 2017 at 11:41 am
I know it feels like an eternity, that time is dragging. Looking back, I don’t remember feeling much healing in the first four months, just a constant ache.. But in time, I did heal. That hole in my heart got smaller and smaller. Look for those moments of joy and strength, however brief they might be, and see if you can expand or recreate them. Look for those pieces of you that are alive, those things that have always given you healthy comfort, and build on them. You are in my hopes and prayers today.