Many years ago, one of my clients told me another client said my therapy consisted of two things: Deep Breathing and Making Lists. That was an oversimplification of course, but sometimes we get in a rut. I incorporated more active listening, which by itself can be therapeutic, with other therapies, broadening my cognitive-behavioral work.
Still, breathing techniques can be helpful in times of stress:
https://joannesilvia.wordpress.com/2014/08/12/remembering-to-breathe/
Our ever-available breath can help us accept the things we cannot change or even give us courage to change the things we can. Have you ever taken a deep breath right before going into a challenging situation?
Making lists can also help us change the things we can. Lists help us organize and prioritize. List making gives me clarity when my thoughts are all over the place.
Here are a few of my favorite lists:
Things to do today. Ideally this should not be a long list, but if it is, be sure to prioritize.
- Go to work √
- Call Dad’s doctor √
- Schedule Vet appointment √
- Drink lots of water. (needs work)
Things I’m NOT doing today.
- I’m not taking down the Christmas Tree,
- I’m not worrying about when to take down the Christmas tree. (Maybe I’ll put valentines on it.)
Things I want to accomplish this week/month/year. Be specific and realistic.
- Spend 1/2 hour a week sketching
- Spend at least 4 hours a month painting, and
- Paint at least one picture that explores ideas for my book cover.
Things I’ve accomplished. Your list is likely a longer than you think.
- Graduated from college
- Got two extraordinary kids through high school
- Worked on forgiveness
- Painted the bathroom
Qualities I am was looking for in a partner.
( Be careful what you wish for. “Must Love Dogs” landed me quite a pack.)
Things I’m not going to consume:
- sodas, except an occasional diet soda
( This list has gotten shorter over the years.)
Foods I will only eat on my birthday, and holidays, ………or when I’ve had a really hard day,……or on some one else’s birthday. Or special occasions. And only in moderation!
- cake
- potato chips
- Ice cream
- cookies
Things I’m going to consume more often:
- Green Leafy veggies: kale, collards, arugula……
- Water
- Foods with Indian Spices
- Quinoa (still figuring out what to do with this)
Ways to say no:
Maybe later.NO.- No thanks,
- Been there, done that, don’t want the headache.
- Sorry. I’m allergic to that.
Ways to stall for time:
- Let me think about it.
- I’ll have to get back to you about that.
- I have to check my schedule.
- I have to go to the bathroom!
Things I’m going to buy with my income tax return:
- Put
all of itsome of it on the principle of my mortgage. - Buy something for the house that will make life easier.
- Go to the movies.
Things I want to do when I retire:
- Write more.
- Paint more.
- Read more.
- Teach kids (or adults) to read, write and paint.
- Putter in the back yard.
- Take a walk every day.
- Visit Yosemite, then head north!
Things I like about myself:
- Honesty
- Open Minded
- Artistic
- Conscientious
- Natural
- Always Learning
That felt pretty therapeutic to me.
Do you like to make lists?
January 29, 2015 at 12:34 am
good post topic, JoAnne, one that likely works well for many people. As for me, I abandoned lists years ago when i found that more was always being added to the list(s) than was being ‘checked off.’ Now I simply know and keep in mind my most pressing actions/intentions. It’s a manageable process for me. 🙂
January 29, 2015 at 2:46 am
I admit, many of these lists are in my head. But sometimes actually seeing the list helps me organize the clutter better. My “to do” lists don’t go beyond a day or two before I start a new list. We do what works best for each of us. Thanks for sharing a different perspective.
January 29, 2015 at 9:38 am
Lists in my head is what works… The minute I write them down, I get too focused on the plan rather than the execution. But it sure gives a peace of mind.
January 30, 2015 at 2:05 am
There is that risk of getting too focused on the plan. I bet you have a great memory for those head lists. I think sometimes my head gets too full. That’s where my lists come in handy.
January 31, 2015 at 12:53 am
I love to make lists. They help me stay focus. Sometimes, I forget things in my head lol so writing a list is effective for me.
January 31, 2015 at 5:12 am
Same here, JcCee. Thanks for stopping by and sharing! 🙂
February 8, 2015 at 10:21 am
Yup, I make lists. I find it helps when I’m feeling overwhelmed by things that are waiting to be done. If I carry the lists in my head I have to keep going through them so I don’t forget anything. If I write things down I can prioritise them better, and I don’t have to worry about forgetting anything.
February 9, 2015 at 12:24 am
Thats how it works for me too.